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Leadership

5 Tips for Entry-Level Tech Leaders to Avoid Common Mistakes

Stepping into a leadership role in the tech space might be both, an exciting and daunting experience. As an entry-level tech leader, you not only have to manage projects and technical challenges but also guide your team, lead collaboration, and make strategic decisions. The transition from Subject Matter Expert to a leader can be tricky, but with the right mindset and strategies, you can set yourself (and your team) up for success. Here are five practical tips to help you navigate the early stages of your leadership journey and avoid common mistakes, so you don’t get discouraged before things start to get going properly. #1 Embrace the Shift from “Doer” to “Enabler” One of the most significant challenges for new tech leaders is letting go of the “hands-on” work they were so good at as individual contributors. Sounds familiar? Leadership is not about doing all the work yourself but enabling your team to succeed. You like it or not, this shift in mindset is crucial, so you really can start doing what the leader’s role is really about. The biggest mistake here? Micromanaging or taking over tasks because you believe you can do them faster or better. Of course you do! You’ve been doing those things for months, sometimes for years, so obviously it’s in your genius zone. But by accepting the leadership position you also accepted saying goodbye to those tasks to say hello to the new ones. You can’t have both. What you can do here? – Delegate Effectively: Identify the strengths of your team members and assign tasks accordingly. Trust them to deliver, and provide guidance only when needed. Share your knowledge and experience (if you have it), unlock bottlenecks so they can deliver work efficiently. That’s your role and effective delegation skills are essential for your success. – Focus on Outcomes, Not Processes: Instead of obsessing over how something is done, set clear expectations for the results and let your team figure out the “how.” Your how can be completely different than theirs, but it the outcome is delivered… It’s all that matters. I know that it hurts but if you are the smartest person in the room, you need to change the room. – Use tools like Trello or Asana to track progress without checking or controlling every single detail. If you can’t trust them, they won’t trust you. And this is the first step to going deep down in the rabbit hole of lack of engagement, efficiency and misery. I don’t know about you, but I don’t want to be a leader that builds that kind of environment for myself and my people. #2 Build Culture of Open Communication As a new leader, earning the trust of your team is essential. Without trust, collaboration suffers, and your ability to lead effectively diminishes. Open communication is the foundation of that trust, you like it or not. The biggest mistake here? Assuming that people automatically will come to you with problems. Mutual respect is to build, it doesn’t come with the leadership role itself. What you can do here? – Be Transparent: Share the goals, direction and decision-making processes with your team. This helps them understand your priorities and align with them, and if they not, you can discuss it using data, not assumptions. – Schedule Regular 1:1s: Invest time to check in with each team member individually. Use this time to listen actively, provide feedback, and address concerns, if they occur. Make sure that both of you use the time you have, not for the monologue from your side. – Create a Contracted Space: Make contract with your team on the rules around team meetings, retrospective and innovation brainstorms. Make sure that you really walk the walk the rule of permission for making mistakes. You can even say, “Mistakes are opportunities to learn—let’s solve this together.” #3 Prioritize Learning and Adaptability Technology evolves rapidly, and so do the challenges of leadership. Being open to learning—both technical skills and leadership strategies—is key to staying effective and efficient. One doesn’t exist without another, and it’s about the time to make your peace with that statement. The biggest mistake here? Believing you need to have all the answers or pretending to know everything. What you can do here? – Adopt a Growth Mindset: Treat every challenge as an opportunity to grow. If you’re unsure about something, admit it and commit to finding the answer. Come back to the team with a solution you can all discuss and learn around. Perfection doesn’t exist, only really insecure people will tell you otherwise. Building a Growth Mindset is a real thing, focusing on that will bring you a lot of benefits (professional and private ones). – Seek Mentorship: Connect with leaders more experienced than you, in your organization or outside of it. Ask questions about their leadership journey and learn from their successes and failures. You don’t need to listen to every piece of advice you’ll get from them, but choose what’s applicable to your case and move on faster. – Invest in Learning Resources: Read books on leadership, listen to podcasts, attend workshops, or take online courses. Whatever your learning preferences are, you can invest your time in being 1% better every single day. Even if it’s just 5 minutes. #4 Set Clear Goals and Align Your Team Without clear goals, even the most talented team can lose focus. As a leader, it’s your job to define priorities and ensure everyone is rowing in the same direction. The biggest mistake here? Overloading the team with too many objectives or failing to communicate priorities effectively. What you can do here? – Use OKRs. Objectives and Key Results is one of my favorite method to boost the efficiency and effectiveness of a person, team and organization. Why? Because it’s not telling us “read 3 books”, it’s not a real goal. It answers the question: “SO WHAT?” you’ve read those

13 April 2025 No Comments

Leadership

Work Drama Triangle (and How to Escape It)

The Drama Triangle is a psychological and social model of human interaction that highlights dysfunctional dynamics often seen in relationships, workplaces, and personal lives. Created by Stephen Karpman in 1968, this model identifies three primary roles people unconsciously adopt: the Victim, the Persecutor, and the Rescuer. While these roles may feel familiar and even comforting in the moment, they often lead to unproductive behaviors and strained relationships. By understanding the Drama Triangle and replacing it with healthier patterns like the Winning Triangle, we can transform our interactions and create more positive outcomes. And strengthen our muscle of Communication Intelligence (CQ). Let’s dig deeper into the subject today so you can understand better your behavior patterns with a practical solutions on how to get out of it. The Story of the Drama Triangle Stephen Karpman, a student of transactional analysis, developed the Drama Triangle to illustrate how people can become trapped in unhealthy relational patterns. These roles are not fixed, and individuals may shift between them during a single interaction. The triangle often begins with one person adopting a role, which triggers complementary roles in others, creating a cycle of blame, helplessness, and over-involvement. Let’s explore these roles in detail: The Victim The Victim feels powerless, overwhelmed, and unable to take responsibility for their situation. This role is characterized by self-pity and an underlying belief that “I can’t do it” or “Life is unfair.” Behaviors: Avoidance of responsibility, learned helplessness, seeking sympathy. Typical Sentences: – “Why does this always happen to me?” – “I can’t handle this.” – “No one understands how hard this is for me.” Position in the OK-OK Matrix: The Victim operates from an “I’m not OK, you’re OK” position, perceiving themselves as inferior or incapable compared to others. The Persecutor The Persecutor blames and criticizes others to maintain control or assert dominance. They often feel justified in their actions but lack empathy for others. Behaviors: Aggression, fault-finding, micromanaging. Typical Sentences: – “This is all your fault.” – “You never do anything right.” – “If you had just listened to me, we wouldn’t be in this mess.” Position in the OK-OK Matrix: The Persecutor operates from an “I’m OK, you’re not OK” position, seeing themselves as superior while devaluing others. The Rescuer The Rescuer intervenes excessively to “save” others, often neglecting their own needs. While their actions may appear helpful, they can enable Victims to remain passive and dependent. Behaviors: Overhelping, unsolicited advice-giving, neglecting self-care. Typical Sentences: – “Let me fix this for you.” – “You can’t do this without me.” – “Don’t worry; I’ll handle everything.” Position in the OK-OK Matrix: The Rescuer operates from an “I’m OK, you’re not OK” position but masks it with seemingly altruistic behavior. What Is the Cost of the Drama Triangle at Work? When workplace interactions are led by the Drama Triangle, several negative outcomes emerge: – Decreased Productivity: Time and energy are wasted on blame-shifting or rescuing instead of solving problems collaboratively. – Eroded Trust: Dysfunctional dynamics create resentment and reduce psychological safety among team members. – Stagnation: Victims avoid growth opportunities, Persecutors stifle creativity through criticism, and Rescuers prevent others from developing autonomy. – Burnout: Rescuers often overextend themselves, while Victims feel perpetually overwhelmed and Persecutors experience frustration from unmet expectations. In essence, the Drama Triangle traps individuals in cycles of conflict and inefficiency, undermining both individual well-being and organizational success. The Winning Triangle: A Healthier Alternative To break free from the Drama Triangle, Acey Choy introduced the Winning Triangle as a model for healthier interactions. This framework replaces the dysfunctional roles of Victim, Persecutor, and Rescuer with three constructive counterparts: Vulnerable, Assertive, and Caring/Coaching. These roles empower individuals to take responsibility for themselves while keeping respect and collaboration with others. And to operate from OK-OK position that gives us a chance to use all of our skills and growth mindset. Vulnerable (Replacing the Victim) Vulnerability involves acknowledging one’s feelings and needs without going into the realm of helplessness. It requires self-awareness and a willingness to seek support constructively. What can you do? – Admit when you’re struggling but frame it as an opportunity for growth. – Ask for help without expecting others to solve everything for you. – Use “I” statements to express your needs clearly. How can you say it? – “I’m feeling overwhelmed; can we brainstorm solutions together?” – “I need some support with this task—could you guide me through it?” Vulnerability fosters authenticity and encourages open communication. It creates an environment where challenges are addressed collaboratively rather than avoided. It’s healthier, creating a space to grow, make mistakes and learn from them, as well as using the experience and wisdom of others’. Assertive (Replacing the Persecutor) Assertiveness involves expressing one’s thoughts and boundaries respectfully while considering others’ perspectives. It balances confidence with empathy. What can you do? – Provide constructive feedback rather than criticism. – Set boundaries clearly but kindly. – Focus on solutions instead of assigning blame. How can you say it? – “I noticed an issue with this report; let’s discuss how we can improve it.” – “I value your input, but I need some time to focus on my own tasks right now.” Assertiveness promotes accountability and problem-solving without alienating others. It helps create a culture of respect and mutual understanding, without treating people like worse or stupid. It’s creating a chance for everybody to take their own responsibility for what they do at work. Caring (Replacing the Rescuer) Caring involves offering support without overstepping boundaries or fostering dependency. It respects others’ autonomy while providing encouragement. What can you do? – Offer help only when it’s needed or requested. – Encourage others to take ownership of their responsibilities. – Practice active listening without immediately jumping in with solutions. How can you say it? – “How can I support you in resolving this issue?” – “You’ve got this—I’m here if you need guidance.” Caring builds trust and empowers

16 March 2025 No Comments

Leadership

3 Leadership Lessons I Learned from Bad Recruitment Processes

Recruitment is often described as both an art and a science—a delicate balance of intuition, data, and strategy. But sometimes, even with the best intentions, things can go awry. I’ve learned this the hard way. Over the years, my experience in leadership have taught me that recruitment mistakes are not just costly in terms of money but also in terms of time, energy, and efficiency. Today, I want to share with you three of my biggest lessons from bad recruitment decisions that I hope will help you to not repeat those in your leadership practice. #1 The Rush: When Speed Wins With Strategy There was a time when I was desperate to fill a position on my team. Aren’t we really in constant situations like that? I remember that we had a critical project coming up, I was drowning under the amount of tasks I had on my list and I convinced myself that having “someone”—anyone—on board quickly was better than waiting for the better fit. I rushed through the process, skipping some of the deeper evaluations and settling for a candidate who seemed “good enough.” The result? It ended up costing me more than I ever anticipated. The person lacked the skills and mindset needed for the role, and within six months, we had to part ways. Not only did this mean starting the recruitment process all over again, but it also disrupted my work, again. According to research by the Society for Human Resource Management (SHRM), the average cost per hire is around $4,700. However, if you make a bad hire, the costs skyrocket. Studies estimate that replacing an employee can cost anywhere from 8 to 12 months of their salary. For example, if you hire someone with an annual salary of $50,000, replacing them could cost you between $33,000 and $50,000. And that’s just the financial side—what about the lost productivity and influence on yourself? On the team? This experience taught me a crucial lesson: rushing to fill a position is like building a house on quicksand. It may seem like you’re saving time in the short term, but in reality, you’re setting yourself up for long-term instability. #2 The Bias Trap: Judging by Brands, Not Skills Another mistake I’ve made is being overly impressed by the organizations listed on a candidate’s CV. When someone came from a big-name company or a well-known brand, I found myself assuming they must be ready to do the job. After all, if they worked at such prestigious places, they must be highly capable, right? Wrong. One candidate I hired had an impressive resume filled with experience at top-tier organizations. I was so dazzled by their background that I overlooked some red flags during the interview process—things like their lack of enthusiasm for the role or their vague answers about past achievements. It turned out that their success in previous roles was largely due to the systems and teams already in place at those organizations. In my smaller, more dynamic team, they struggled to adapt and contribute effectively. This mistake taught me to focus on the specific person, not just their past affiliations. A brand name on a CV doesn’t guarantee a cultural, personality-based or skill set fit for your organization. Now, I dig deeper during interviews, asking specific questions about their contributions and how they handle challenges in different environments. #3 Ignoring the Personality Match As someone deeply invested in Communication Intelligence (CQ) and the Process Communication Model (PCM), I know how critical personality dynamics are in any working relationship. Yet, there have been times when I ignored this knowledge during recruitment—and paid the price for it. I once hired someone who looked perfect on paper: they had the right skills, experience, and even glowing references. But what I failed to assess was how well we would work together on a personal level. Our communication styles clashed almost immediately. Where I value directness and proactive problem-solving, they preferred a more passive approach and avoided conflict at all costs. Data vs emotions. Logic vs relationship care. Nothing wrong about that, don’t get me wrong! But it comes with a cost, especially when you work in a small setup. This mismatch didn’t just affect our one-on-one interactions; it also impacted the overall efficiency. When there isn’t alignment between a leader and their team members, it creates friction that slows down decision-making and execution. According to Gallup research, disengaged employees can cost organizations up to 18% of their annual salary in lost productivity. Imagine what happens when that disengagement spreads across an entire team! Now, I make personality assessments a non-negotiable part of my recruitment process. Tools like PCM are there to use: I’m not saying that you do a questionnaire for every single candidate since it’ll cost a lot (if you can afford it, go for it!). It’s about using the framework in practice. Listen, observe, connect the dots. Everything is there, you just need to know what you’re looking for. Moving Forward: How to Avoid These Pitfalls Here’s what I’ve learned to do differently: Prioritize Fit Over Speed: Take the time to find someone who aligns with your team’s needs and culture—even if it means extending your search timeline. Remember that fast recruitment can cost you so much more time in the future. Dig Deeper Into Experience: Don’t be swayed by big names on a CV; focus on understanding what the candidate actually contributed in their previous roles. Assess Personality Compatibility: Use tools like PCM or other personality assessments or knowledge from the framework to ensure alignment between you and your potential hire. Recruitment is never going to be an exact science, but by learning from past mistakes and implementing more thoughtful strategies, you can significantly improve your chances of finding the right person for your team—and avoiding costly missteps along the way. Final Thoughts As leaders, we often feel immense pressure to make quick decisions and keep

16 February 2025 No Comments

Leadership

Mastering Tough Conversations: A Tech Leader’s Guide to 1:1s (That Nobody Really Wants to Lead)

As a tech leader, you’re no stranger to challenges—tight deadlines, complex projects, and ever-evolving technology are part of the job. But one of the most delicate challenges you’ll face doesn’t involve code or systems; it involves people. Leading tough conversations with employees is an essential skill that separates good leaders from great ones. Whether it’s addressing underperformance, delivering hard feedback, or navigating team conflicts, these moments can define your leadership. This guide equips you with actionable tools to lead tough conversations effectively, using a structured approach that combines contracting, Communication Intelligence (CQ), including the Process Communication Model (PCM). Let’s dive in. When Tough Conversations Are Necessary: Scenarios You’ll Encounter Before we get into the how, let’s identify the when. Here are common situations where a tough conversation might arise: Underperformance: An employee is consistently missing deadlines or delivering work in a quality we agreed on. Behavioral issues: A team member exhibits disruptive behavior, such as frequent conflicts with peers or unprofessional communication. Career Development: You need to inform an employee that they didn’t receive a promotion or that their role is changing. Restructuring: Delivering news about layoffs or departmental changes. Personal Concerns: Addressing sensitive issues like burnout, mental health, or personal struggles impacting performance. Each of these scenarios requires a thoughtful approach to ensure the conversation is productive and respectful. And none of those are easy: there’s no one-size-fits-all approach so it might sound like a hell to a tech leader. But we have some algorytms that you can use to run the meeting with success. The Framework: Contracting, CQ, and PCM To handle these conversations effectively, use three elements to have a success no matter what kind of situation you are facing. Contracting: Establish clear agreements on three levels—administrative, professional, and psychological. You have more about the contracting itself, the levels and what to do to make sure the contract is fully covered in this article. Communication Intelligence (CQ) muscle: Flex your communication style to meet the employee where they are emotionally and mentally. Managing reactions that are always emotional (you like it or not) is our job as leaders: we need to know what triggers which behavior and what to do to overcome or address it when it appears. Process Communication Model (PCM) Framework: Tailor your approach to the employee’s personality base for maximum impact. Match the language and way of communication they need, not your favorite ones. That’s crucial for the conversation to be successful: you’re leading it for them, not for yourself. Part 1: Contracting—Setting the Stage for Success Contracting involves creating clarity and mutual understanding before diving into the conversation. What are the essentials of 3 levels that are inside? – Administrative Contracting: Define the logistics. Where will the meeting take place? How long will it last? What’s the agenda? Example: “Let’s meet in my office at 2 PM for 30 minutes to discuss your recent project performance.” Take care of this during and after as well. “What is the deadline to implement what we’re talking about?” – Professional Contracting: Clarify roles and expectations. Emphasize that this is a professional discussion and its goal is to find solutions, not to blame anybody for anything. Example: “My role is to provide feedback and support you in improving; I would like for your role to share your perspective and be engaged in the next steps we are going to create together during this meeting.” – Psychological Contracting: Set the emotional tone by creating a space for a person. Acknowledge that the conversation might be difficult but make sure you are focused on the positive outcome. Example: “I know this might be uncomfortable, but I want you to know this is coming from a place of support and wanting to help you succeed.” Part 2: Flex Your CQ Muscle Communication Intelligence (CQ) is your ability to adapt your communication style based on the situation and the other person’s needs and preferences. In tough conversations, this means balancing focus with accountability. What are the easiest 3 things that you can do as a leader to make sure you’re using your CQ muscle? – Listen Actively: Truly hear what the employee is saying without interrupting or jumping to conclusions. Make notes. Paraphrase, check if you understand as your employee intended you to. Don’t assume, ask. – Acknowledge Emotions: If the employee feels upset, angry or defensive, name the emotion without judgment. Example: “I can see this feedback is frustrating for you.” or “I understand that situation is infuriating.” Don’t underestimate the state, let it be, check what kind of information is hidden below this emotion. Use it in the solution creation phase. – Stay Calm and Focused: Keep your tone steady and avoid escalating tension, even if emotions run high. I know that’s one of the hardest things to do: most of the time we go angry when the other person is angry. We mirror each other, that’s how our brain is wired. But by being conscious of that, we can stop the automatic pattern and break it by being more mindful and goal-oriented. When you observe something like that, say to yourself: “What is the goal of this conversation? What I want to achieve here?” That kind of reminder is going to take you back to the OK-OK state and continue with more clear view of mind. Part 3: Tailor Your Approach with PCM—Speak Their Language The Process Communication Model (PCM) identifies six personality types, each with unique communication preferences and stress patterns. Understanding these types allows you to tailor your message effectively. Here’s a quick breakdown: Thinker: Logical, organized, values data and structure. – Approach: Be clear, factual, and provide detailed explanations. – Stress Behavior: May become overly critical or perfectionistic, attack others for lack of thinking or logical approach. Persister: Principled, dedicated, values integrity and commitment. – Approach: Appeal to their sense of purpose and principles. – Stress Behavior: May become judgmental or

8 February 2025 No Comments

Leadership

What Are Most Common Beliefs That Hold Tech Leaders Back?

As a Tech Leader, you’re tasked with guiding innovation, meeting deadlines, and managing diverse teams—all while navigating the complexities of human dynamics. It’s no small challenge. But what if I told you that some of the beliefs you hold about leadership might actually be holding you back from creating an environment where people want to stay and thrive? Let’s take a closer look at three of the most common beliefs that I encounter when working with Tech Leaders and explore actionable solutions to shift your mindset and approach. Belief 1: “If I’m not the expert in the room, I’ll lose respect.” Many Tech Leaders feel immense pressure to always have the answers. After all, you’ve likely climbed the ranks because of your technical expertise. But leadership isn’t about being the smartest person in the room—it’s about enabling others to shine (it hurts, I know). The problem is that when you focus on showcasing your expertise, you risk micromanaging or overshadowing your team’s contributions. This can stifle creativity and lead to disengagement: your people think won’t have enough space to try out new solutions, make mistakes and learn from them to build their own expertise. Solution? Shift from being the “expert” to being the “facilitator.” Ask open-ended questions like, “What do you think we should do here?” or “How can we approach this differently?” Empower your team to take ownership of their ideas and solutions. Remember, respect is earned not by knowing everything but by fostering trust and collaboration. Belief 2: “Feedback will demotivate my team.” I often hear leaders say they avoid giving constructive feedback because they fear it will hurt morale. While it’s true that poorly delivered feedback can cause friction, avoiding it altogether is far more damaging in the long run. The problem is that without feedback, your team doesn’t know where they stand or how they can improve. This ambiguity can lead to frustration, disengagement, and even turnover: all those things are not the ideal situation for you, as a leader, and for your team as well. There are very costly: losing one employee is a cost of 8-12 monthly salaries of this person (in average). Solution? Reframe feedback as an opportunity for growth rather than criticism. Use a structured approach, even the most common ones like “Start-Stop-Continue” will be a huge help (and easy to implement): – Start: What new behaviors or actions could help them grow? – Stop: What habits or approaches might be holding them back? – Continue: What are they already doing well that they should keep up? Deliver feedback with using Communication Intelligence (CQ) muscle, tailor the communication to your employee’s needs, be specific, and always tie it back to their potential and goals. Belief 3: “People leave because of better opportunities, not because of me.” It’s easy to blame external factors when someone leaves your team—higher salaries, exciting projects elsewhere, or personal reasons. While those factors do play a role, research consistently shows that people leave managers, not companies. The problem is that assuming turnover is out of your control absolves you of responsibility for creating a supportive environment. This mindset prevents you from addressing underlying issues within your team dynamic. Solution? Conduct regular one-on-one check-ins where you ask questions like: – “What’s one thing I could do to support you better?” – “Do you think that you’re challenged and fulfilled enough in your role? If not, what can we do to move a needle here?” – “What’s your long-term vision, and how can I help you get there?” By showing genuine interest in your team’s well-being and career aspirations, you’ll build loyalty and reduce turnover. It’s not so obvious to have a leader that actually care and think about their employees’ in more holistic approach. The bottom line Leadership is as much about unlearning as it is about learning. By challenging these common beliefs and adopting a more people-centric mindset, you’ll not only become a stronger leader but also create a work environment where people feel valued and inspired to stay. Remember: great leaders don’t just manage tasks—they cultivate trust, growth, and connection. That’s the kind of environment people don’t want to leave. Ready to challenge more leadership beliefs? Go and listen to the latest episode of Leman Tech Leadership Podcast!

1 February 2025 No Comments

Leadership

Breaking the Code: Myths About Mistakes in Tech World

As Tech Leaders, we often find ourselves navigating a world of constant change, high stakes, and the persistent pressure to deliver. In this fast-paced environment, mistakes are inevitable. Yet, despite their inevitability, mistakes often carry an unnecessary stigma, especially in the technology sector. We’ve all been there: a bug in production, a failed sprint, or a product launch that didn’t hit the mark. These moments can feel like personal failures, but they’re also opportunities for growth—if we allow them to be. Unfortunately, many of us are held back by persistent myths about mistakes that do more harm than good. Let’s unpack these myths and explore how tech leaders can reframe their thinking to foster innovation and resilience within their teams. Myth 1: Mistakes Are a Sign of Incompetence This is perhaps the most damaging myth of all. In a field as complex as technology, mistakes are not just normal—they’re expected. Yet, many Tech Leaders (and their teams) fear that admitting to errors will make them appear unqualified or incapable. Here’s the truth: mistakes are not a reflection of incompetence but rather a natural byproduct of working on resolving complex problems. In fact, some of the most groundbreaking innovations in tech have come from mistakes. Take the accidental creation of Post-it Notes or the discovery of penicillin—while not directly tech-related, these examples remind us that groundbreaking discovery often follows missteps. As a leader, it’s your job to model curiosity. When you own up to your own mistakes and frame them as learning opportunities, you create a culture where your team feels safe to take risks and innovate. Myth 2: Perfection Is the Goal Let’s face it: perfection in tech doesn’t exist. There will always be bugs in the code, unforeseen edge cases, or unexpected user behaviors. Yet, many leaders fall into the trap of striving for perfection, believing that flawless execution is the ultimate measure of success. And we do know that’s far from the truth. The pursuit of perfection can paralyze teams, leading to analysis paralysis and delayed decision-making. Worse yet, it can stifle creativity and experimentation—two critical drivers of innovation in technology. Instead of chasing perfection, focus on progress. Encourage your team to adopt an iterative mindset: ship, learn, and improve. Agile methodologies are built on this principle for a reason—they prioritize adaptability over rigid adherence to an idealized end state. Remember, your job as a leader isn’t to eliminate mistakes but to create an environment where mistakes lead to better outcomes. Myth 3: Mistakes Waste Time and Resources It’s easy to view mistakes as setbacks that cost time and money. But what if we flipped that perspective? What if we saw mistakes as investments in future success? Consider this: every mistake your team makes is a chance to uncover blind spots, refine processes, and build resilience. A bug in production might reveal gaps in your testing strategy. A failed product launch could highlight misalignment between engineering and marketing teams. These insights are invaluable—they help you course-correct and prevent larger issues down the line. Of course, not all mistakes are created equal. As a leader, it’s important to distinguish between reckless errors (caused by carelessness or lack of preparation) and intelligent (or even necessary) ones (made in the pursuit of innovation). Celebrate the latter and use them as teachable moments for your team. Myth 4: Leaders Should Have All the Answers As Tech Leaders, we often feel pressure to be the smartest person in the room—the one with all the answers. But this mindset is not only unrealistic; it’s counterproductive. When you position yourself as infallible, you surprisingly discourage your team from speaking up or challenging assumptions. This can lead to groupthink, missed opportunities for improvement or other limiting biases that rob us from achieving extraordinary results. Instead, embrace a mindset of continuous learning. Ask questions, seek input from your team, and admit when you don’t know something. By doing so, you demonstrate humility and foster a culture of collaboration and shared ownership. Remember, leadership isn’t about having all the answers—it’s about empowering your team to find them together. Myth 5: Mistakes Are Best Swept Under the Rug In some organizations, there’s an unspoken rule: don’t talk about mistakes. This culture of silence can be incredibly toxic, leading to fear, blame-shifting, and a lack of accountability. As a leader, it’s your responsibility to break this cycle. Encourage open dialogue about mistakes and frame them as opportunities for growth. Conduct retrospective sessions after incidents or project failures to identify root causes and actionable takeaways. Transparency is key here—not just within your team but across your organization. When leaders openly discuss their own missteps and what they’ve learned from them, it normalizes the idea that mistakes are part of the process. Reframing Mistakes as the Golden Key So how can we, as Tech Leaders, shift our perspective on mistakes? Here are a few practical strategies: Lead by example: Share your own experiences with failure and what you learned from them during team meetings or one-on-ones. Celebrate learning moments: Recognize team members who take risks and learn from their mistakes—even if the outcome wasn’t what they hoped for. Create psychological safety: Foster an environment where team members feel safe to admit errors without fear of punishment or being laughed at. Encourage reflection: After a mistake occurs, ask your team reflective questions like “What did we learn?” or “How can we do better in the future?” Focus on systems: Instead of blaming individuals for mistakes, look at the systems and processes that contributed to them and identify areas for improvement. The bottom line Mistakes are not the enemy—they’re an essential part of growth in the tech world (and beyond). As leaders, our role is not to eliminate mistakes but to create a culture where they’re seen as opportunities for learning and innovation. By reframing these common myths and our approach to failure, we can build teams that are resilient, creative,

25 January 2025 No Comments

Leadership

10 Ways to Get Your Time Back: Practical Tips for a Tech Leader

As a Tech Leader, your day is likely filled with endless meetings, urgent emails, project deadlines, and unexpected crises. It’s easy to feel like there’s never enough time to focus on what truly matters—whether that’s strategic thinking, team development, or even your own well-being. But here’s the good news: with a few intentional changes, you can reclaim your time and focus on what drives real impact. This isn’t about pretty theories or abstract advice. Below, you’ll find 10 practical, actionable tips that you can start implementing today to get your time back. Interested? Let’s get to it! #1 Audit Your Calendar Your calendar tells the story of where your time goes—and often, it’s not a pretty picture. Start by reviewing your calendar for the past two weeks. Ask yourself: Which meetings were truly necessary? Could some have been shorter? Were there meetings I didn’t need to attend at all as a leader of my team? Depends on the answers, make some shifts. Move meetings around, if you have influence on them: put them in the time of the day that you’re not in your genius zone. Use the calendar as you source of power, not a thing you are a slave of. Actionable Tip: For every recurring meeting on your calendar, apply the “zero-based budgeting” approach. Assume the meeting doesn’t need to exist unless there’s a compelling reason to keep it. For meetings you do keep, limit them to 25 or 50 minutes instead of the standard 30 or 60 minutes—this will force more focused discussions and give you breathing room between calls. #2 Delegate Like a Pro Leader Tech Leaders often fall into the trap of trying to do everything themselves—whether it’s troubleshooting a technical issue or reviewing every line of code. But delegation isn’t just about offloading tasks; it’s about empowering your team and creating space for you to focus on higher-level priorities. Actionable Tip: Use the “3D Framework” for tasks: Do it, Delegate it, or Delete it. If a task doesn’t absolutely require your expertise, delegate it to someone who can handle it. And if it doesn’t add value, delete it altogether. Make sure of good contracting around the delegation though: it needs to be clear, including context, checking on the skillset of the person who’s going to get the task. Be smart here; don’t assume: ask. #3 Batch Similar Tasks Together Switching between tasks—like coding, answering emails or Slack / Teams messages, and attending meetings—can drain your mental energy and waste time. Instead, group similar tasks together and tackle them in dedicated blocks of time. Actionable Tip: Create “themed” days or blocks of time. For example: – Monday mornings: Strategic planning – Tuesday afternoons: One-on-ones with team members – Friday mornings: Deep work on a long-term project When you batch tasks, you reduce context-switching and increase focus. Let’s say it once for good: there’s no such thing as multitasking. You can switch between tasks really quickly, but it has its cost. Reduce it, be more focused and you’ll see the difference in your efficiency and energy level as a leader. #4 Say “No” More Often Every time you say “yes” to something, you’re saying “no” to something else—often your own priorities. Learning to say “no”, or “yes, and…” is one of the most powerful ways to protect your time as a Tech Leader. Actionable Tip: When someone asks for your time, don’t respond immediately. Instead, say: “Let me think about it and get back to you.” This gives you space to evaluate whether the request aligns with your goals. If it doesn’t, politely decline or suggest an alternative solution. Remember about being in OK-OK space: you don’t want to be rude or aggressive; boundary setting is not about hurting others, it’s about protecting yourself. #5 Leverage Asynchronous Communication Not every conversation needs to happen in real-time. In fact, asynchronous communication can save you hours each week by reducing unnecessary meetings and interruptions. Actionable Tip: Use tools like Slack, MS Teams, or Loom to communicate asynchronously. For example, instead of scheduling a meeting to discuss a project update, record a short video or write a detailed message outlining the key points and next steps. Bonus Tip: Set clear expectations for response times in asynchronous channels (i.e., “respond within 24 hours”) so everyone stays aligned without feeling pressured to reply instantly. #6 Automate Repetitive Tasks If you’re spending time on repetitive tasks that could be automated, you’re leaving valuable hours on the table. Automation isn’t just for developers—it’s a key productivity tool for all of us, regardless of our role in the organization. Actionable Tip: Identify one repetitive task you handle weekly (i.e., generating reports, scheduling meetings, answering emails) and automate it using tools like Zapier, IFTTT, or custom scripts. Example: Automate status updates by integrating project management tools like Jira or Trello with Slack so your team gets real-time progress updates without manual intervention. #7 Create Decision-Making Frameworks Decision fatigue is real—and as a tech leader, you’re probably making dozens of decisions every day. And we have a limited decision capacity: we make around 35,000 decisions daily, but less than 100 are optimal. Creating frameworks can help streamline this process and free up mental energy for more important work and more capacity for better decisions. Actionable Tip: Develop simple decision-making criteria for recurring situations. For example: Hiring decisions: Does this candidate have at least 70% of the required skills? Project prioritization: Does this initiative align with our top three business goals? Task selection: Does this task bring me closer to the OKRs I have on my list for this quarter? By standardizing decisions, you’ll spend less time deliberating and more time executing. #8 Adopt a “Less is More” Leadership Mindset In Tech Leadership, more isn’t always better—more features, more meetings, more initiatives can lead to diminishing returns. Focus on doing fewer things exceptionally well rather than spreading yourself too

5 January 2025 No Comments

Leadership

Communication Intelligence (CQ): A Key to the Effective Leadership

In the ever-evolving landscape of work, where collaboration and innovation are necessary to survive on the demanding market, one skill stands out as a game-changer: Communication Intelligence (CQ). As a tech leadership expert and someone deeply invested in helping leaders and teams create environments where people thrive, I cannot stress enough the importance of mastering CQ. It’s not just about talking or listening; it’s about understanding, tailoring, and connecting. Let’s dive into what CQ is, why it matters, and how we can build this skill: both as leaders and team members. What Is Communication Intelligence (CQ)? At its core, Communication Intelligence (CQ) is the ability to adapt your communication style to connect effectively with others. It’s about being aware of your own communication tendencies while recognizing and responding to the diverse preferences of those around you. Think of it as emotional intelligence (EQ) but focused specifically on how we exchange information, ideas, and emotions. CQ involves empathy, adaptability, and clarity. It’s not just about what you say but how you say it—and how it’s received. Mastering CQ means being intentional in your interactions and ensuring that your message resonates with the person or people on the other side. Why Is CQ Essential for Leaders and Team Members? In my work with leaders and teams, I often see how miscommunication can ruin even the best intentions. A lack of CQ can lead to misunderstandings, conflict, and disengagement. On the flip side, strong CQ fosters trust, collaboration, and alignment: key ingredients for both thriving teams and great business results. Here’s why CQ is crucial: #1 For Leaders: they set the tone for communication within their teams. If a leader lacks CQ, they risk alienating team members, failing to inspire, or unintentionally creating a culture of fear or confusion. Leaders with high CQ can tailor their messages to motivate diverse individuals, navigate difficult conversations with grace, and build an environment where everyone feels heard and valued. #2 For Team Members: in a team setting, CQ helps individuals collaborate more effectively. When team members understand each other’s communication styles, they can avoid unnecessary friction and build stronger relationships. High CQ also empowers individuals to voice their ideas in ways that resonate with others, fostering innovation and mutual respect. Understanding what high CQ looks like (and what it doesn’t) is key to developing this skill. Let’s explore some examples and anti-examples. Examples of High CQ Behaviors: – active listening: truly hearing what someone is saying without interrupting or jumping to conclusions to soon, – tailoring messaging: adapting your tone, language, or delivery based on the audience. For instance, explaining a technical concept in simple terms for a non-technical stakeholder, – understanding in action: acknowledging someone’s emotions and needs before moving to problem-solving. For example, saying, “I can see this situation has been frustrating for you” before diving into solutions, – clarity in feedback: providing constructive feedback that is specific, actionable, and framed positively. And what’s even more: giving people space to take it in and make a decision what they want to do with it (take or discard), – proactive negative conflict resolution: addressing misunderstandings early rather than letting them grow and eat people alive. And remembering that not all conflicts are bad (actually a fear of conflict is one of the 5 Dysfunctions Of The Team by Patrick Lencioni). Anti-Examples of Low CQ Behaviors: – interrupting or talking over others: this signals a lack of respect and can shut down meaningful dialogue. It also means that you don’t care about the other person, or anything they say or think, – one-size-fits-all communication: using the same approach for everyone without considering individual preferences or needs. There’s only 17% of chances that the person next to you prefers your communication base. That’s why listening and tailoring is so important: to get the stakes higher than that, – ignoring non-verbal cues: overlooking body language or tone that suggests someone is uncomfortable or disengaged. We have 4 things we can observe: mimics, ton of voice, gestures and posture. Ignoring those non-verbal imformation is going to cost us a lot, – defensiveness in feedback: reacting negatively when receiving constructive criticism instead of seeking to understand, ask more questions, be curious about what the other person wants to say to me, – avoiding difficult conversations: failing to address issues directly, leading to confusion or resentment. And the further it goes, the worse it becomes: it’s really difficiult to stop the huge snowball. So what we can do to avoid those anti-examples? Use PCM to Build it! One of the most effective tools I use when working with leaders and teams on CQ is the Process Communication Model (PCM). PCM provides a framework for understanding different personality types and their communication preferences. It’s like having a map that helps you navigate the complexities of human interaction. So why PCM is a good idea to support buildling a high CQ level? It gives you bigger self-awareness: start by identifying your own dominant personality type. This helps you understand your natural communication style and potential blind spots. With whom it’s super easy to go with and when it will be a bigger challenge. It equips you with higher ability of observation: pay attention to the verbal and non-verbal cues of others to identify their preferred communication style. For example: – A Thinker might appreciate detailed agendas and logical arguments. – A Harmonizer may respond better to warmth and emotional connection. It gives you a reason to adapt more: tailor your communication to match the other person’s style. If you’re a Promoter speaking with an Imaginer, slow down and give them time to process rather than pushing for immediate action. It shows you how to practice under stress: PCM also teaches us how stress impacts communication. For instance, under stress, a Thinker might become overly critical, while a Rebel might resort to sarcasm and manipulation. Recognizing these patterns helps us respond constructively rather than

29 November 2024 No Comments

Leadership

3 Lessons on How I’ve Wasted Time as a Leader

As leaders, time is one of our most valuable resources, yet it’s one we often misuse without even realizing it. Reflecting on my own leadership journey, I’ve identified three significant ways I’ve wasted time (at least, so far). These lessons and the things I’ve started to do differently as a positive consequence of them have not only shaped how I lead today but have also helped me become a more effective and focused person. My goal by sharing these lessons is to help you avoid some of the same pitfalls and grow as a leader. Regardless of where you are on your leadership path. Lesson 1: Waiting for Perfection One of the earliest and most persistent mistakes I made as a leader was waiting for perfection before making decisions or moving forward. Whether it was launching a new product, rolling out a process change, or even sending an email to the team or organization, I would delay action until I felt everything was flawless. My belief was that perfection equaled success. However, especially in tech world, where innovation moves at lightning speed, waiting for perfection often means missing opportunities or waisted time. I remember one situation vividly when my team had developed a very promising growth program for the leadership team. Instead of releasing an MVP and iterate based on peoples’ feedback, I insisted on refining every detail before launch. By the time we released it, some of the needs where already covered and part of the program was pointless. Solution? My turning point came when I embraced the concept of “progress over perfection.” I began to prioritize speed and adaptability over getting everything right the first time. One of the tools that helped me was implementing agile tools within my team. By breaking projects into smaller, iterative cycles, we were able to deliver value faster and make improvements based on real-world feedback. I also adopted a mindset shift: I stopped seeing imperfection as failure and started viewing it as an opportunity to learn and grow. Now, I encourage people I work with to release early and often, knowing that we can course-correct along the way. This approach has not only saved us time but has also fostered a culture of innovation and showing people that adaptability is the most important thing when we want to achieve a lasting success. Lesson 2: Looking for an Ideal Candidate Another way I wasted time as a leader was obsessing over finding the “perfect” candidate for open roles on my team. I would spend months searching for someone who checked every box on the job description: SME skills & knowledge, cultural fit, growth potential. It was only to realize that this person rarely exists. I recall one hiring process where I was looking for a senior facilitator to lead a critical growth project. I turned down several qualified candidates because they didn’t meet my impossibly high standards. In the meantime, the project has begun, I needed to deliver most of the things on my own. I was exhausted, my other tasks were put on hold since it was impossible for me to do everything. I finally made a hire, and it became clear that many of the “must-have” qualities I’d been fixated on weren’t as critical as I thought. Solution? I learned to focus on potential rather than perfection when hiring. Instead of searching for someone who ticks every box, I now look for candidates who demonstrate a growth mindset, strong problem-solving skills, and the ability to adapt to the changing needs of the business. To make this shift, I changed a little the hiring process to include scenarios and problem-solving exercises that reflect real challenges that we face. This gives me better insight as a leader into how candidates think and approach problems rather than just their resume qualifications. Additionally, I started investing more in onboarding and training. By providing new hires with the tools and support they need to succeed, we’ve been able to develop talent internally instead of waiting for the “perfect” external hire. This not only saves time but also builds loyalty and engagement within the team. Lesson 3: Focusing on the Wrong Things As leaders, it’s easy to get caught up in tasks that feel urgent but don’t actually move the needle. For me, this often-looked like micromanaging or spending too much time on operational details rather than strategic priorities. I remember a period when my calendar was packed with meetings about minor issues: approving small budget requests, troubleshooting technical things on the e-learning platform, or reviewing every slide of the training deck. While these tasks felt important in the moment, they distracted me from higher-level responsibilities that nobody can do, but me. The result? Burnout for me and frustration for my team, who felt stifled by my constant involvement in their work. Solution? The first step to breaking this cycle was learning how to delegate effectively. Even if I teach others how to delegate, I sometimes struggle with giving things away since I know exactly how to do them on my own. I realized that by holding onto tasks that others could handle, I was not only wasting my own time but also robbing my team of opportunities to grow and take ownership. I started by identifying tasks that didn’t require my direct involvement and assigning them to team members who were capable (or could become capable with some guidance). To ensure success, I provided clear expectations and allowed space for mistakes. The real space, not only on the paper. If team doesn’t make mistakes that means that they never try doing something new or different. And I don’t want that kind of stagnation and fear in my team. I also adopted a strong system for prioritization. Always using the check point on how this task makes an impact on our goals, we all know how to choose when the task list is endless. This helped me stay aligned

23 November 2024 No Comments

Leadership

Why Leaders Quit Learning and How to Overcome It?

In today’s fast-paced world, the importance of continuous learning cannot be overstated, especially for leaders. However, many leaders find themselves ceasing to learn over time, which can have huge (and negative) effects on their organization, team and their personal growth. Understanding why leaders quit learning and finding solutions to these challenges is crucial for sustained success. Here are five essential reasons why leaders stop learning and how they can overcome these obstacles. 1. Success is already achieved, right? Many leaders become satisfied after achieving a certain level of success. They feel that their current knowledge and skills are sufficient to maintain their position and continue leading effectively. This state can lead to stagnation and a lack of innovation: can be a fog that stop us from seeing things clearly. Sometimes it’s also connected with: “I’ve learned something 2/5/10 years ago and it worked. Why should I bother learning something new?!”. Sure thing, we can use the knowledge and experiences from the past. But we also know that the world changes all the time. And the speed of those changes is extremely high. Solution? Leaders should cultivate a mindset of lifelong learning. Embracing the idea that there is always more to learn can keep them motivated. One practical approach is setting personal learning goals each year, quarter, month (or even a day), such as reading / listening to a certain number of books, attending workshops, or enrolling in online courses. For instance, Bill Gates is known for his habit of reading 50 books a year, which keeps him informed and inspired. 2. Overwhelmed by Responsibilities Leaders often juggle multiple responsibilities, leaving them with little time or energy to focus on learning. The demands of their roles can make it challenging to prioritize personal and professional development. AKA: “I don’t have time or energy”. This sentence barely goes through my throat since for me, there’s no such thing as lack of time. It’s only a lack of priority. Solution? Task and energy management is a key. Leaders should schedule dedicated time for learning activities, just as they would for any other important meeting. This might include setting aside an hour each day for reading or listening to educational podcasts during commutes. Additionally, delegating tasks and empowering team members can free up time for leaders to focus on their growth. The key is to get the time back, not to use constantly the old excuse. Einstein said that the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result. I couldn’t agree more. 3. Fear of Vulnerability Admitting a lack of knowledge or skill can make leaders feel vulnerable, especially if they believe it might undermine their authority. This fear can prevent them from seeking new learning opportunities. Also, it’s necessary to step into the uncomfortable while learning. It might mean making mistakes, that… other people can see! (OMG, that’s the end of the world!). We have so many limiting beliefs in our brains and this on should be on the top of our lists to exchange with a new one immediately. Solution? Embracing vulnerability as a strength rather than a weakness is essential. Leaders can create a culture of learning within their organizations by openly sharing their own learning journeys and encouraging others to do the same. For example, Satya Nadella, CEO of Microsoft, promotes a “learn-it-all” culture rather than a “know-it-all” approach, which has been instrumental in transforming the company. 4. Lack of Feedback Without regular feedback, leaders may not be aware of areas where they need improvement. This lack of insight can lead to a false sense of competence, discouraging further learning. And there are so many new skills (technical / SME-oriented, and social / leadership) that sometimes we simply don’t know what to choose. It’s not surprising! And when we don’t know where to focus, we often choosing not doing anything at all. Solution? Seeking feedback from supervisors, peers, mentors, and team members can provide valuable insights into areas for growth. Leaders should actively solicit constructive feedback and use it as a foundation for their learning plans. Implementing a regular asking mode, even if it’s just sending a short e-mail to 10 people once per quarter with the note: “Hi! I just wanted to ask you for 2 things. What I do well when we work together? What can I do better?” This way we actively seek information with examples from people that can really answer those questions. Easy, simple and doable: how does it sound as a quick implementation idea? 5. Rapid Technological Changes The rapid pace of technological advancements can be intimidating, especially for leaders who are not tech-savvy. The fear of not keeping up with the latest trends can discourage them from trying to learn about new technologies. 2 weeks ago, I’ve started a new growth path in one of the companies I work with. I included some AI tools to show them how they can use the tech tools so they get their time back that they spend right now on repetitive, easy tasks, so they can invest it somewhere else. A bunch of people at the end of the workshop said: “You know what, Alex? It’s all great, extremely useful. But after this workshop I see how big of a gap I must fill out.”. It wasn’t my intention at all! I gave them 3-4 tools + one platform that they can use as a browser if they want to cover a specific need. And that was all! But the feeling or a though in themselves was so strong that we needed to spend a while on addressing that properly. Solution? Leaders should focus on building digital literacy by starting with the basics and gradually advancing their skills. Enrolling in beginner-friendly courses or workshops can help demystify technology. Additionally, partnering with tech-savvy team members or hiring digital consultants can provide guidance and support. The most important thing? Start small. You don’t need to be an expert

16 November 2024 No Comments

Leadership

5 Biggest Leadership Feedback Mistakes

As a leader, giving feedback is an essential part of your role. However, there are some common mistakes that leaders make when delivering feedback that can have huge effects on the individual, the team, and the organization as a whole. As we want to be as efficient as possible and not waste time or effort on insufficient communication, it’s important to be aware of these pitfalls and have ready-to-use ways to avoid them. Here are five things that leaders shouldn’t do while giving others feedback, along with examples of the potential consequences that you can save yourself from. Ready? Let’s dig in. 1. Being overly critical without providing constructive guidance One of the biggest mistakes a leader can make when giving feedback is being overly critical without providing constructive guidance. For example, if a team member presents a project and the leader simply says, “This is terrible,” “A monkey would do it better” without offering any specific feedback or suggestions for improvement, it can be incredibly demoralizing for the person. This kind of feedback can lead to a huge decrease of intrinsic motivation and confidence in the team member, as well as a thud in an overall team morale. In the long run, it can also result in a decrease in productivity and innovation within the organization. This is not a feedback from OK-OK quardant at all. We were talking about it why it is crucial to speak from this space in the article and podcast, but I will say it one more time. If you are not in an OK-OK zone, first thing you need to do is to go back there, by covering your motivational needs and only then move to the conversation with the other person. Without that, the conversation will always be stresful, full of aggresion, manipulation or withdrawal of one or both sides. 2. Failing to tailor feedback to the individual’s communication base Another common mistake is failing to tailor feedback to the individual’s communication preference. For instance, if a leader gives feedback in a direct manner (Promoter) to an employee who prefers a more empathetic and nurturative approach (Harmonizer), it can lead to miscommunication and misunderstandings. This can result in a breakdown of trust and rapport between the leader and the team member, as well as hinder the individual’s ability to fully understand and act on the feedback. Ultimately, this can impact the team’s cohesiveness and collaboration, as well as the organization’s overall communication effectiveness. When we use a one-size-fits-all approach, we are so surpried that the feedback doesn’t land. Or sometimes it works, and sometimes it doesn’t. So we blame people, sometimes by saying: “What is so hard to understand?!” or “Others get it and you can’t!”. Basically: it’s about you, not about me. So it has a huge cost, for us as leaders, and for our team as well. Let’s not be mad on others: we can be mad on an educational system that doesn’t teach us communication at school, but both ways are a waste of time. I would say that we rather invest this time in learning and practicing on how to match the needs of the other person and crafting feedback so it’s custom-made. 3. Using feedback as a means of control or manipulation Using feedback as a means of control or manipulation is another mistake that leaders should avoid. For example, if a leader gives feedback with the intention of pushing a team member into conforming to their own agenda or way of thinking, it can create a toxic and disempowering work environment. This kind of behavior can lead to resentment and disengagement among team members, as well as a lack of creativity and initiative within the team. Over time, it can also result in high turnover rates and a negative reputation for the organization. We are coming back again here to the OK-OK mode. If we don’t have a positive intention while sitting at the table with an employee, there’s no chance to end the meeting with an agreement. At least, not with the honest one. There’s a 4A Feedback Guidline that was created by Reed Hasting at Netflix. And the first A is an “Aim to assist”. Always have that in mind. You don’t have it? Go find it, and then sit with a person to have a proper conversation. 4. Ignoring the emotional impact of feedback Ignoring the emotional impact of feedback is another critical mistake that leaders often make. Regardless of the personality base of the person, if it’s a Harmonizer or anybody else, it always has an impact on a person. Mostly because we have so bad feedabck experiences from the bast that on each sentence that includes “feedabck” in it, we respond with a higher stress level right away. That kind of lack of awareness and insensivity can result in increased distress (negative stress) and anxiety level for the team member, as well as a decrease in their overall well-being and job satisfaction. Going further, it can lead to the high level of resistance, being close to the suggestions or ideas of the leader. In turn, this can lead to higher levels of absenteeism and decreased productivity within the team, ultimately impacting the organization’s bottom line. So I say: let’s be more mindful, check with people how they are doing before, during and after the conversation. Ask for feedabck for ourselves: what we do really well? And what can we do better when it comes to leading those conversations? Each situation is an opportunity for us to learn and be better next time. It’s like training and strenghtening a muscle. 5. Failing to follow up on feedback Finally, failing to follow up on feedback is a mistake that can hinder an individual’s growth and development. For example, if a leader provides feedback on a specific area for improvement but fails to follow up with ongoing support and guidance, it can lead to stagnation and a lack of progress. This can

9 November 2024 No Comments

Leadership

Leading Edge: 7 Things the Best Leaders Do Daily

We talk so much about what leaders do wrong. What kind of mistakes they make, what skills they lack of or why people leave them. And as it’s important to be conscious and honest, it’s also quite depressing. Are we all really that bad in what we do? Of course not! Every day I see a lot of good behaviors, reactions and habits that leaders do, and it makes them great for their people. We tend to focus on the gaps and not seeing the gains: that’s why I think a lot of us fail miserably. Because of the constant feeling or thought of not being enough. What sets the best leaders apart from the rest then? Let’s dig deeper into this one today. #1 They Lead by Example The best leaders don’t just talk the talk, they walk the walk. They set an example for others to follow by embodying the values and principles they expect from their team. Whether it’s showing up early, staying late, or going above and beyond in their work, the best leaders lead by example and inspire others to do the same. The same thing applies when it comes to the growth: how on Earth team members should be focused on learning when they don’t see it in their leader? It’s about both, skillset and mindset. Being better version of ourselves every single day. It’s like with children: they model what we do more than listen to what we say. Of course, words have a huge power, but it’s all about action. Where the focus goes, the energy flows. #2 They Use Communication Intelligence Communication is key in any relationship, and it’s especially important in a leadership role. The best leaders are able to clearly and effectively communicate their vision, expectations, and feedback to their team. They are also great listeners, open to feedback, and willing to have difficult conversations when necessary. This is all about communication intelligence: to be able to listen or read (depending on the situation), make strong hypothesis who is speaking to us on the other side and tailor the communication accordingly. Then to mindfully observe if it’s landing how we aimed it for. If yes, great! If not, change it: there’s always space to improve, to shape the communication better. It’s like a muscle on the gym: weak at the beginning, but it strengths up every time you train. #3 They Empower Their Team The best leaders understand that they can’t do it all on their own. They empower their team by delegating tasks, providing opportunities for growth and development, and trusting their team to make decisions. By empowering their team, the best leaders create a sense of ownership and accountability that drives success. Sometimes I see leaders that are not delegating tasks and then they are surprised by two things. Number 1 is that they are exhausted from doing everything on their own. Number 2 is that the team is not improving their skills, so they can’t trust to give them the more difficult or advanced tasks. No kidding, right? It’s a vicious cycle: if they don’t do it, they’ll never learn. You have a lot of Juniors in your team? Take baby steps. Give small tasks, recognize for what they need and then move to the next level. #4 They Inspire and Create Motivational Work Environment Great leaders have the ability to inspire and create that kind of environment that will create high level of intrinsic motivation in their team to achieve greatness. Whether it’s through their passion, enthusiasm, or ability to paint a compelling vision of the future, the best leaders are able to ignite a fire within their team that drives them to go above and beyond. Those leaders understand that we all are individuals, with different needs, hungers, aspirations, values and desires. There’s no one-size-fits-all approach: if we are leaders, we need to tailor the elements of the environment so it’s good for the whole team. It’s like with tailoring communication that we mentioned before. Not easy, but necessary (if we want for our people to thrive and not quit of course). #5 They Adapt to Change The best leaders understand that change is inevitable and are able to adapt and thrive in ever-changing environments. They are flexible, open-minded, and able to pivot when necessary. Instead of resisting change, the best leaders embrace it and see it as an opportunity for growth and improvement. The key word here? The Growth Mindset. Without the mind that wants to learn, sees opportunities in every situation (especially those that are uncomfortable, new or challenging) and believes that things are happening FOR us, not TO us. Do you want to have a leader like that? Yeah, me too. #6 They Foster a Positive Culture The best leaders understand the importance of creating a positive work culture. We have so much darkness around us, so much pain, war, diseases, troubles, scarcity. If we stay in the work environment that focuses on the same mindset, we’ll attract more of that. As mentioned before: where the focus goes, the energy flows. If we focus on what’s wrong, hard, on all of those bad changes that are happening in the organization, we’ll get more of the dark side of life and work. But, if we focus on what’s right, on the abundance of options, opportunities to learn, meet and growth with new people, use mentorship, create value for others what do you think we’ll get more of? Exactly. #7 They Lead with Integrity Integrity is a non-negotiable quality for the best leaders. They lead with honesty, transparency, and a strong moral compass. Even if they don’t have the full knowledge, they share with the team what they know and can give them to cut off the rumors or fear. They hold themselves and others accountable for their actions and always do what is right, even when it’s

2 November 2024 No Comments

Transactional Analysis

PCM: Communication Channels

When I was describing all 6 Process Communication Model (PCM) types, it dawned on me that if I want to find one aspect of it that interests me, I need to go into each article and look for one part. And there are some of those, that are more important to dig deeper into, a good example is the aspect of communication channel. So I’ve decided that I’ll go into this directing to simplify and edit this experience for you: to go into some aspects of PCM, with practical examples. Hope that’ll be useful and will give you all the impulse to start using it in real life. What Are Communication Channels? Before we go into the details, let’s start with answering this questions: what a channel actually is? Communication channel is the way we build a sentence we want to push forward the other person (doesn’t matter if it’s a written or verbal communication). Surprisingly it really does matter if we put a question mark or a period at the end of the sentence. It matters so much that most of the time it has a huge influence on if the communication will go through or not (will be efficient or will lead to a misunderstanding). What do I mean by that? Take a look on those examples (purposefully not business-related): What do you think about this painting? Please tell me what you think about this painting. Oh man, what a painting, I’m sure it kills us both just from looking at it!!!!! Thank you for being here with me to marvel this painting, I’m more than happy to hear your impressions on it. Do you see the difference? We all have one dominant preference of getting and using the channel, depends on our personality base. When you look on those sentences: which one is the most comfortable for you? Depending on which one you choose, it’s a strong indicator of your base. Requestive Channel The first sentence is a great example of a requestive channel. As you can see, the idea is simple: ask a question (so a sentence with a question mark at the end of it). Using the knowledge that you already have, you can see the difference between the questions that we can ask towards 2 bases that will prefer this channel: Thinker and Persister. Channel is only one part of the puzzle: if we want communication to go through with success we need to combine a preferred channel with a favorite perception. That’s why we’ll ask different question within a conversation with a Thinker and Persister. We’ll ask: Thinker: “What do you think…?” Persister “What is your opinion on…? / What do you believe…?” It is important to ask the right questions. And as much important is to know which channels are not so good to use in communication with certain types. Thinker and Persister will react really badly on others, but the worst thing you can do is to use directive channel. It will trigger them to go straight into distress, reactive aggressively form their attacker mask. Directive Channel Directive channel is about creating the sentence with the dot at the end of it. I would love for all of us to demystify being direct and separate it from being aggressive, rude or too pushy. Being directive is just saying what there’s to be done: I’m not asking you or hesitate. I just say it in a straightforward way, taking care of OK-OK perspective. Two PCM types prefer to get it: Promoter and Imaginer. And again, it will differ on how we build a communication to each of them. That’s because their need of getting directive channel is different: Promoter doesn’t want to waste time, so they just want to get a task and move to action. Imaginer wants to be invited to share what’s in their heads, so they need direct communication to do that. So, the way we is this channel matters. We’ll say: Promoter: “Please create this report for tomorrow, not later than 5PM.” Imaginer: “I need this report to be done by tomorrow, not later than 5PM. Please tell me what you see in your head when I ask you to do it.” Both are tasks we want to delegate for a person but said differently. They are not very good at receiving requestive channel, also Imaginer will react with a drooper mask on Emotive one (too much emotion for them). Emotive Channel Emotive channel is about the positive energy and contact. As we can easily guess, the Rebel is our person here: it’s their favorite channel. In this one they can exchange energy, creative ideas, brainstorm and get into positive contact with others. It works even if it’s just for a little bit at the beginning of the conversation. How can it look like? “OH MAAAAN, this weekend was so dope, I need to tell you about it!” “C’mon, let’s do it and then we’ll go into the agenda: it won’t kill us to talk a little bit!” It is about 2-3 exchanges and then you can go to the point of the meeting or a conversation. Sometimes it’s just about the exchange and that’s enough: especially when you are a Rebel in a base yourself, you’ll enjoy the conversation itself if it’s led that way. Nurturative Channel Last but not least: Harmonizer and their preferred nurturative channel. Nurturative channel is all about seeing a person, feeding their recognition of person need. Harmonizers needs to be seen, as an important part of a team, community or other relationship. Sometimes it’s enough to say: “Thank you for being here. I know that recently it’s been crazy busy and hard, so I really appreciate you finding time to talk.” The key thing here is to give a positive, nurturing recognition of a person, making them visible and important. In the world of endless task lists, constant rush and not

8 September 2024 No Comments

Leadership

Do I Even Want to Be a Leader?

Why people accept being leaders? Is this something we dream about as kids? When we get the question: “Who you would like to be when you grow up?”, do we answer: “A middle manager in the huge, global organization”? Is it a matter of a “natural talent” we have and show as children to lead or maybe a set of skills that every person can learn and then use quite successfully? Why is that some people are great leaders for their teams and the others (statistically bigger representation) are making people miserable and in consequence: quitting? Let’s unpack this subject today. The Story of One Tech Leader… I work a lot with First Time Managers. Those are people who are fresh in leadership positions, statistically up to 3 years in the role. Most of the time there were great SMEs (Subject Matter Experts) and a natural move for them to grow was to be offered with a Team Leader role of the team there work in. I remember very well one story that relate to a Tech Leader I worked with in the mentoring process a couple years back. He was a very skilled expert in one of the leading technologies that was used in the core product of the company. He started as a junior, but learned very quickly, constantly participating in trainings, conferences and projects, working on different implementations and most of the time building functionalities from scratch. When he grew to the expert position, he also got the task of teaching others, onboarding new team members and acting as a technical mentor to them. He was doing great. Then, as an obvious offer for the organization he got a proposition to become a Team Lead of the team: the same one that he was an expert within. He took the job: the money wasn’t extremely bigger, but potentially more organizational and strategic impact was an argument that he was sold to. He thought: “I know everything about the scope of the team’s work, what else can there possibly be?” A few weeks later in the role showed him otherwise. He started to be a completely different person: like he had some hidden personality that was there, waiting to be awaken for so long. He started to be mean to team members, getting angry and mad very quickly when he saw any mistakes or imperfections in what the team delivered. He even got constructive feedback, by name on team daily meetings: what was unacceptable and never happened before. The team engagement started to drop; first people made decisions about leaving the area that they loved working within. That was the moment when he was redirected to me, so I support him in this situation. Why People Accepting Leadership Roles? This story shows us a few aspects of why we accept those roles connected to People Management when they are on the table. What I see from working with different cases and circumstances, there are 5 reasons that are the most common: I would say they cover 80% of all decision about choosing this career path: 1. The only way to grow. Sometimes people don’t see other options. They think that accepting leadership position is the only way they can be promoted or have possibilities to learn. Either is their strong belief that can have a root even in childhood (if it was a home conviction, being expressed loudly so we picked it up as children and we took it for life) or an experience from different organizations from the past. Sometimes it is true that organizations offer more, i.e. trainings, workshops, mentorship opportunities for leaders. It shouldn’t take place, so if you see if, I would advise to reach out your supervisor or HR person to take a closer look on that. 2. Fancy position name. Team Lead, Manager, Director, Head: the higher in the structure, the fancier it sounds. And the better it looks on LinkedIn or the resume. Potentially of course. The question is: do you want to grow in the leadership space in your current and different organizations on the market in the future? If yes, ok: the name of the positions matters, since recruitment process is marketing process (for both sides). If not: it doesn’t really matter. So, first: go and answer this question. 3. More potential influence / power. Sometimes we take leadership positions because we believe that’s the only way to make a real change. To get a seat at the table, to have opportunities to say things out loud, to be an advocate of what we say as a team. To have more positive influence or power to reshape a work environment, even if it’s just a small piece of it. The question is: is it a really a truth that by changing the role to be a leader, you will have this influence, more than you have as an expert? 4. Better visibility. I hear this one a lot. And it’s connected with the more influence and power element described above, sometimes treated as one thing. “If I’m a leader, I’ll be more visible = I’ll have more credibility to make a real change.” It also comes with the visibility on the market or in the specific part of the industry: when I’m a leader, I will be more reliable, my LinkedIn will blow out and I will have countless invites as an expert / speaker / podcast guest etc. Is it really a truth? Can’t you be all of these as a real expert in your area? 5. More money. Here comes a catch. The money part most of the time comes at the very beginning of the list of reasons on why to accept the leader role. And you know what? It’s not always the case. I saw multiple examples of extremely skilled, well-known experts that earned way more money than their supervisors. Because their skillset was super niched out, and there were

11 August 2024 No Comments

Leadership

What a Leader Should Do When People Don’t Listen?

Did you ever had a situation when you’ve delegated a task, asked for something, gave a feedback or recognition and your employee didn’t listen? You thought that you’ve been crystal clear about your intention or what’s there to be done, but it didn’t land? Or maybe a member of your team even nodded their head, but it wasn’t delivered as you’ve asked? What comes to your head in the situations like that? What’s wrong with them? Or maybe it’s about me, I can’t even communicate with my own team? Let’s unpack it today and take a closer look on the root cause and potential solutions. Is it about them as employees… What makes a leader efficient and reliable? Once I was working with a leader in 1:1 mentoring process and he asked me this question: “Alex, what can I do so my team is more efficient? I do so many things, I give my people so much autonomy, they can do everything they want, but they don’t deliver things I ask them to. I would kill for so much freedom that I offer them.” Oh, here we go. The problem statement was “my people don’t listen to me, and they don’t deliver”. And the first question that I asked was: “Why do you think it happens?”. This leader looked at me like I was a crazy person, and he said: “It’s obvious: they’re disengaged and lazy”. The first thing that came to his brain. “Is this a fact or your interpretation of the reality?” He started to think. It took him a while, but afterwards he started to analyze. “Well… Sometimes when we are under a lot of time pressure, I’m more directive and distribute work among team members. We don’t have time then for discussions, it’s just a matter of delivering on a short deadline. I can tell that they work super efficiently then: like a pressure is a good thing for them”. Oh, here we go x2. In a lot of stories like that, the first thing of a leader is: it’s about them, not about me. And sometimes it really is about them. Lack of commitment, engagement, intrinsic motivation or skills: it can all happen. And we, as people, have different phases in our life: sometimes we are in an extremely good place, sometimes not so much. In a workplace, it’s our job as leaders to investigate what is the root cause of a certain behavior. Most of us are not psychologists or therapists, and it’s not our job to pretend that we are. But being curious, ask questions or make some statements that we’ll verify with an employee are tools to minimize the risk of the negative influence. In the example above, the time pressure and short deadline wasn’t the “motivator”. It was a directive channel of communication that the leader has used to distribute the work. Evidently his team consists of more Promoters and/or Imaginers than other PCM types. And notice what he said: “I would kill for so much freedom that I offer them”. So, by giving them so much of an autonomy he covers his own frustrated need, not theirs. The intention is good, but he’s not addressing the right need. … or maybe about me as a leader? We all have our own stories, experiences from the past, beliefs and convictions from our early childhood that shaped what we think and feel about ourselves and the world that’s around us. That’s perfectly fine: that’s what making us human. The question is: how much those things influence your leadership approach? You say: people don’t listen, I say: “why is that happening?”. Most of the time people don’t listen because you don’t speak their language: you speak your own and you expect for them to understand you. It’s like you speak English to a person who only speaks Spanish. The same part of the brain is responsible for using the foreign language as for using the language of different perceptions. If you talk data and I talk emotions, it’s almost impossible for us to get along. We just don’t understand each other, because we literally speak different languages. The same thing is with the way we speak, so the communication channels. As in the example of a leader above: he gave people so much autonomy, probably without being more direct and concrete about the specifics that the team was lost in the fog. He didn’t want to be too harsh or pushy (in his head), so he hasn’t decided to use the directive channel that his team actually needed. How we speak does matter: whether it’s about the words that we use or about the way we build the sentences (channels). People listen better when the communication is tailored to their needs, and there’s no one-size-fits-all. Solutions? Know your people. If you are not aware what are the personality Bases of your team members, come back to the PCM materials, then make strong hypothesis of it and test them in reality. You can always use the Process Communication Model questionnaire and have a crystal-clear report, but you can also handle this without it. Get a little knowledge and use it, one step at the time. It doesn’t need to be perfect at the very beginning: the key thing is that you start building this muscle of recognizing the Base, so you can more automatically go straight into the better communication. Remember which words and channel use to which type. It’s crucial to tailor your communication. If you are going to speak the language of your people, they will listen and deliver work. Write down on one piece of paper all 6 PCM types with their main key words + preferred communication channel. Have it somewhere close to your laptop, so you can use it any time you’ll have a conversation. We all learn and that’s fine to have a little help at the beginning. What matters at

27 July 2024 No Comments

Leadership

5 Types of Challenge That Each Leader Can Face

Being a leader is a difficult job. If you are a leader and nobody never said that to you, that means the very first offer to cover a leadership position you’ve got was not prepared very well. When we take a manager’s or leader’s job, most of us don’t know what kind of tasks and types of challenge are there, waiting to welcome us on this new journey. Many leaders on the first stages of this career path are frustrated, shocked, angry, sometimes sad. Basically it’s the whole Kübler-Ross grieving curve: we experience all of those emotions that we feel while grieving or going through any other change (positive or negative) in our life. That’s mostly because we are not prepared properly to what we are going to face in real life. It’s not only a fancy position name, more money, prestige, power or a better parking spot. What’s more important: the whole palette of people’s needs, emotions, reactions, personality types, communication styles and needs, talents, struggles and many, many more. Today we are going to cover 5 of the most common types of challenge that you can face as a leader and we’ll try to give you some answers in terms of what you can do to either overcome it, or to deal with every challenge in the best possible way. 1. Lack of motivation / engagement When do you know that your employee has a low level of internal motivation? What kind of behaviors are telling you that a certain person is not engaged? Usually you can see a decrease in efficiency and effectiveness, lower mood, an easiness to get into distress, higher possibility to get frustrated, irritated or just tired more frequently than in the past. You can observe that the employee doesn’t care about other people, sometimes saying not very flattering things about their or other teams, or even the whole organization. You can also tell that this person is never happy: whatever you do, they always find something that is not perfect enough for them. Sounds familiar? Those behaviors are one of the hardest things to deal with, since no one wants energy vampires to be in their lives, not to mention those people who can directly influence their work effects. And it’s super easy to go into this rabbit hole with your employee: to support them, to show them that you care and at the end of the day, just sit in the corner and whine with them. But after a while we just don’t want to create any more new solutions if an employee is not eager to change their way of working or behaving. Pretty often managers are not familiar with the real reasons why their employees are not motivated or engaged as they “should”. They don’t dig deeper into the subject, don’t ask questions and are not curious about the answer. They assume that it’s about money or a burnout connected with being in one work place for too long. And in 80% of the cases it’s not true. What you can do as a manager is to get to know what is the real reason of being in this state of mind. Maybe it’s something personal, troubles at home or with their health? Maybe it’s lack of growth opportunities, learning, challenge or mentoring and not a money thing? Maybe it’s about the mismatch of the position that this person has at the moment with their talents, skills and plans for the future? The possibilities are endless, but we need to get to the truth to act accordingly. If you don’t have the real reason, you can’t tailor the solution with an employee to respond to it in a good way. So it becomes a challenge that you can’t overcome. 2. Weak communication / not answering the questions I guess most of us had more than one situation in our life when you ask a question and don’t get the response we aimed for (or there is no response at all). For example, you ask your employee what can you do to support their career development. And you get the response “I don’t know” or “nothing”. Or when you see that your significant other has a bad mood and you ask “what is it?” and they say “nothing”, when it’s clearly something going on. Weak communication can mean something different for each of us: sometimes it’s a complete lack of communication (i.e. a person doesn’t speak or answer a question), sometimes a person is not clear, or not responding directly. In other cases people can be triggered somehow and respond goes from the emotional side of themselves, i.e. from anger or sadness: not necessarily adequately to the situation. For some people a problem itself is the way people communicate, because it’s really far from how they talk with others. What can manager do to improve this area? PCM can be a good start: it will give you a lot of answers to the questions about why people react in a certain way in the communication-related situation (so let’s face it: 90% of the professional cases we face every day). When you have information about the way you communicate and how your people communicate it’s easier to understand, analyze and improve the way every side communicates in each situation. The second thing can be checking the needs (hungers): does your employee has any frustrations in this area? Maybe they are a high structure need and there is a mess in the organization? It can be a source of this lack of communication (if I don’t have my structure, I’m not taking with others until I have what I need). You can take a look on this space and act on it to reduce the frustration: it can be a game-changer for you and for your employees. 3. Personal / professional development aversion Did you ever experience a situation with an employee when you started to ask questions about their growth or

6 June 2023 No Comments

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