Lemanskills.com

Does The Way You Feed Your Brain Influence Who You Are?

We often hear: “you are what you eat”. But not very often we reflect on how the content we are feeding our brain with makes us becoming a certain person. Depends on which sense(s) do you use the most while absorbing what is outside to build what is inside of you, the stimuli can be different and the ways of learning can be different for each of us.

But what is the most important here is that we can become what we take, consciously or unconsciously. And by having more elements in the scope of control, we have more and more influence on how we shape our mindset. You can say: “I read every day, how my mindset can be in danger?”. The point is, reading or seeing something is not the only channel that influences our brain. Let’s divide the ways of feeding our minds, so you can reflect on how you shape your reality by the content you consume every day.

The things you read

For people who consume the most of their content from using the visuals (by reading, looking at things, observing what is around them, how things work etc.), feeding the brain that way will be the best option to grow. For those people by everything they see, they shape their mindset. It’s how they learn in the fastest way possible and how they build the understanding of the world that is around them.

If you are a visual person, everything you read: books, articles, reports, documents, social media posts, comments under the YouTube videos etc.; it all has an influence on what you think, how you feel and what kind of decisions you make in your life. Does all of it has an impact on who you are and how do you feel about yourself and the world? Absolutely! Good, valuable, developmental content – regardless of what is the subject of it (business, career, relations, habits, health, spirituality – you name it) is the key to feed your brain with something that will nourish it. Not a pile of trash that contaminates your body.

How to recognize if the piece of content is feeding or contaminating your brain? Reflect on how you feel after consuming it. It’s just like with the food: you feel different after having healthy, balanced meal in compare to the fast food that you eat within the 5 or 10 minutes in between the meetings, without even sitting at the table.

Do you feel inspired, good about yourself and/or others? Do you have a new portion of energy that you can use to keep your momentum going?

Or you feel bad about yourself, angry, guilty or you lose the whole hope for this world after you read the news for instance? (There is nothing good ever come from reading the news though: did you ever feel good after reading the news? Exactly.)

The things you listen to

Same story, different medium. This category is for people who consume the most of their daily content by listening (to other people talking, podcasts, radio, recordings, music, video – but only sound of it etc.). What they hear is who they become, how they create themselves in this world. When they don’t hear anything, they don’t learn, grow or they even have troubles with a simple existence.

If you are in this bucket, check on what kind of things do you listen to on a daily basis? What kind of resources do you use to feed your listening need well? What kind of authors, storytellers? Audiobooks? Online courses?

Or do you listen to the news and commercials on the radio? Or you listen to all of those whiny people that are talking about how this world is crazy, that changes all the time, is getting worse and worse? And again: how certain pieces of content make you feel? Energized, hopeful? Or rather disengaged, without any hope for the better tomorrow for yourself?

The things you touch and experience

For some people, reading or listening to something is not the way they experience the world that is around them. They need to touch, feel, make a physical connection with a certain object, situation,  moment or other person. They don’t believe before they actually live through something or have something in their hand.

You can either have the experiences that nourish you, or not. When we think about taking the best out of the moments that are happening for us throughout the whole life, there is always something that you can take with you, even when the situation is tough. It is about treating the day without a mistake or weaker moment as a wasted day.

Do you plan your activities or they just happen TO you? Do other people decide on what you do, where you spend your time and energy on? Do you choose what kind of objects and spaces are around you: in the office, home, what kind of gym of open outdoor space you use? Do you have experiences after which you feed energized, inspired, happy, full of new possibilities? Or after what happens every day you feel dejected, sad, with no energy whatsoever? 

The people that are around you

People are interesting species. They can be happy, inspired, successful, open-minded, loving, caring and determined. At the same time they can feel angry, sad, furious, disappointed, frustrated, depressed or not-loved. Depends on what kind of convictions we have in our brain that were constructed there at the very beginning of our lives, we either have a winning or a losing script.

The winning script is a set of assumptions that we have about our life, ourselves, people and situations that are around us that support us in achieving our goals.

The losing script is a set of assumptions that we have that is a kind of self-fulfilling prophecy: that all we do brings us closer to destruction. Whatever we do, everything is going to end the way we predicted and believed in (which is negative of course).

And I put this short introduction to very complex subject here because the construction of the scripts is tightly connected with the people that were with us when we were children, but also that are with us nowadays. Even unconsciously, they can make a huge impact on how we feel (about ourselves and about what happens in our lives), what kind of decisions we make, how we spend our time or how we raise our kids.

You are too young or too old for this. You should be happy about what you have, don’t risk it with this shift. You have a good job, why should you change it for something uncertain? So what your relationship is not perfect? Other people have worse.

If you relate to one or more of those sentences above, you know how those make you feel. Do you feel empowered or invincible after talking with a person who has that kind of attitude? Do you think highly about your skills, possibilities or autonomy that you have as a human being?

I wrote about this in this article: how important it is to gather around yourself people that nourish you, not rob you from the energy that you have. That are your partners in crime, that may be challenging you, but always with the good intention, not the energy vampires that only want to take you down to their own level of misery.

How you nourish your brain by picking up the right people, for being friends with, but also mentors, business partners, team members or role models can be the most important item from the whole list. When I have a chance to choose, I always focus on choosing people that I can share what is in my head with. It is one of the most efficient ways to learn, grow, change things in this world. Even for introverted people, that prefer to use their own company for most of the time, sharing some space in life with a partner to discuss the ideas with can be groundbreaking.

The bottom line

The bottom line here is that how you feed your brain has a huge influence on who you are becoming, every day. And maybe you think that all of those things are out of your control. If yes, I would like to invite you to shift this mindset into different direction. Think about yourself like you were a master of your life. You are in control of what you do, when, with whom. You decide. And not making a decision is also a decision. Reflect on where you can nourish yourself better, what you can change to feel better at the end of each day.

The ultimate goal here is that even if they day is tough and you are tired, it was challenging and hard, after laying down on the couch you think: “it was a good day”.

Udostępnij

Komentarze

0 0 votes
Article Rating
Subscribe
Notify of
0 komentarzy
Oldest
Newest Most Voted
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments

Czytaj także

Leadership

The Number One Struggle of New Tech Leaders (And How to Navigate It)

You’ve just been promoted. The title changed from Senior Developer to Engineering Manager, from Tech Lead to Director of Technology. Congratulations—you’ve worked hard for this moment. But then reality hits. Your inbox explodes. Slack messages pile up faster than you can read them. You’re pulled into meeting after meeting. Your calendar looks like a game of Tetris gone wrong. And that code you used to write? That deep work you loved? It’s now squeezed into whatever gaps remain between 1:1s, stand-ups, stakeholder updates, and strategic planning sessions. Welcome to the number one struggle every brand-new leader in technology faces: Communication overload. The Hidden Cost of Being “Always On” Here’s what nobody tells you when you step into leadership: Your job has fundamentally transformed from creating solutions to constant communication. And the data confirms this shift is real—and overwhelming. According to Grammarly’s 2024 State of Business Communication Report, developed with The Harris Poll, knowledge workers now spend 88% of their workweek communicating. For new tech leaders juggling team management, cross-functional collaboration, and strategic initiatives, that percentage often exceeds 100% of a standard work week. The report reveals something even more alarming: in the past 12 months, 78% of professionals saw increases in communication frequency, while 73% are using more communication channels than ever before. For HR teams and large organizations—exactly where many new tech leaders find themselves—many report spending over 40 hours weekly on communication alone. Think about that for a moment. Communication isn’t just part of the job anymore. Communication is the job. Why New Tech Leaders Feel it Most Intensely? As someone who works with hundreds of tech leaders each year through workshops and one-on-one mentoring, I see this pattern repeatedly. New leaders get caught in what I call the “triple communication trap”: You haven’t let go of your Individual Contributor identity. You were promoted because you were exceptional at solving technical problems. Your brain is wired to think in code, systems, and architecture. But now, your value comes from enabling others to do that work. This identity shift is brutal, and most new leaders try to do both—leading AND coding—which doubles their communication load while halving their effectiveness at each. You lack Communication Intelligence (CQ). We invest heavily in developing technical skills—learning new frameworks, mastering cloud architectures, and understanding AI/ML pipelines. But communication? We assume it’s intuitive. It’s not. Just as you wouldn’t expect someone to write production-ready code without training, you can’t expect leaders to navigate complex human dynamics without developing their Communication Intelligence. As I explored in the article on Communication Debt, many organizations suffer from a severe lack of investment in communication processes. New leaders inherit this debt without realizing it, then struggle to understand why their teams seem disengaged or why projects constantly fail due to “miscommunication.” You’re drowning in channels without a strategy. Email. Slack. Teams. Zoom. Jira. Confluence. GitHub comments. The average tech leader toggles between 8-10 communication platforms daily. Research shows that 55% of professionals say the constant flow of notifications across channels makes it hard to concentrate on important tasks, and 47% feel unsure about selecting the right channel to communicate information. Without a clear communication strategy, new leaders respond reactively to whatever channel screams loudest, creating a perpetual state of context-switching that destroys productivity and cognitive capacity. The Real Price We Pay The communication crisis in tech leadership isn’t just about feeling busy. It has a measurable business impact. Grammarly’s research found that poor communication costs businesses $1.2 trillion annually through lost productivity, elevated turnover, and customer churn. For a single organization, business leaders estimate teams lose 7.47 hours weekly to poor communication, equating to $12,506 per employee yearly. But here’s what hits new leaders hardest: This isn’t about others failing to communicate well. It’s about you learning to communicate strategically as a leader. And nobody taught you how. The consequences compound quickly: Your team becomes disengaged because they’re unclear about priorities and expectations Projects slip because cross-functional alignment fails Top performers leave citing a lack of clarity and direction You burn out trying to be everywhere, for everyone, all the time According to Gallup’s State of the Global Workplace 2024 Report, only one in three employees is engaged at work, and burnout continues to rise. New leaders, trying to prove themselves while learning their role, often push themselves beyond sustainable limits. Two Strategies to Navigate Communication Overload After working with tech leaders across organizations ranging from startups to global enterprises, I’ve identified four core strategies that make the difference between drowning and thriving. #1 Contract and Re-Contract Constantly Most new leaders assume their team knows what’s expected. They don’t. The contract you think you have—about goals, responsibilities, communication norms—exists only in your head. I teach leaders to avoid the toxic questions “Do you have any questions?” and “Is everything clear?” These prompts trigger social pressure to say “yes” even when confusion reigns. Instead, try: “I want to check if I explained this clearly. Can you describe back to me how you understood this?” This simple shift transforms an assumption into confirmation. Do this weekly with your team. When circumstances change (and in tech, they always do), re-contract explicitly rather than making unilateral announcements. #2 Develop Your Communication Intelligence (CQ) Just as you learned technical skills through deliberate practice, you must develop CQ intentionally. This means: Understanding that different people need information delivered in different ways Learning to read behavioral cues that signal misunderstanding or disengagement Recognizing your own communication preferences and consciously stretching beyond them Investing 10-15 seconds at the start of each interaction to observe how the other person communicates, then tailoring your approach Most communication is tailored to ourselves, not to others. We like detailed written documentation, so we send 10-page specs. We prefer face-to-face conversation, so we schedule yet another meeting. Strategic leaders adapt their communication to what works for their audience, not what’s comfortable for them. One CEO I worked with replaced weekly status meetings with short “mission huddles” focused on priorities and

Czytaj dalej
Leadership

Do You Want More Visibility as a Leader? Here’s How to Do It.

To have a greater impact as leaders, we need to be more visible. I know that you would prefer the scenario: “Who needs to know, they know” or “Our product is going to speak for itself”, but the truth is that getting people know about what you do is something that’s not just happening. We need to speak up about our ideas, about what we’ve done, what we’ve designed, what we want to change, or what we’ve changed already, because nobody’s going to notice that on their own. Nobody’s going to guess that it is important, to assume that it’s somehow valuable. Harsh, but true. So today I want to focus on what we can do in practice to build more visibility. I’m going to share with you some of my own strategies, so you can just take, copy, and paste them, adding a little bit more flavour to your individual situation. We are going to divide those things into internal and external leadership visibility strategies.     How to Build Visibility Inside the Organization?   If you’re working in the organization: It can be a big organization / a corporate world, or in a smaller organization, but you are inside, what can you do to build your visibility? First, you have your team level. I’m sure that you have some team meetings, knowledge sharing sessions, weekly meetings, retrospectives; depends on the setup that you are working in. These are the places that are already designed for you to share knowledge, experiences, lessons, mistakes, or failures (with lessons learned) that you can show to others. When you speak up, this is always something that makes you more visible. So even if you’re a Base Imaginer, Base Thinker who has the preference to not speak up very much, I would like you to challenge yourself a little bit to be more verbal. I know that you believe that if you work hard in silence, you create valuable solutions to the problems the organization or clients face, the other people will notice you. I don’t want to be a dream-crusher here, but it’s just not going to happen. People are very focused on their own things and don’t have much spare energy to look around. You need to show them. So, I invite you to do one thing like that per week, in a bi-weekly meeting, or once per month. Start small: The goal is for your brain to see that it makes sense and is worth the stretch. Share something that you’ve created, optimised, or automated recently.  Don’t make it complicated, just use what you’re already doing in your work. The second thing you can do is to share knowledge by sending some links to the podcast episodes that were interesting for you to others, a book you’ve read, a YouTube video you watched, or a digital course you’ve taken. I’m sure that you have some Teams / Slack / WhatsApp group in your company where you share some stuff. Leverage that: Share links to YouTube videos, to TED Talks, to podcasts, to books, to articles, to documentation, to Reddit, basically anything that you’re using to get knowledge. Share that with others with a short comment like: Hey! I’m sharing this as something interesting…, It helped me in a way that…, Check it out!”. Easy. You don’t even need to speak up verbally; you just copy and paste a link. But again, it puts you on the map that you share things with others. That way, you can become a go-to person for people who are looking for a certain answer or a source of knowledge. Being a go-to person builds visibility. Start with the team level and then move up. What can you do on the organizational level? Be the voice. The voice of the change or a project. Engage yourself in the project or initiative team, even if there is some extra work to do. You can always make a contract with your boss to be redirected when it comes to your work to a little bit to some project that is maybe like a matrix project in the organization. Maybe this is something different. Maybe this is something that you never done before. Being more visible by creating value is one of the most important things in organizations. The good news? It is not about speaking up all the time. It’s about being visible by being engaged. Of course, you can make some presentations, being a face of the project or initiative, during the Town Hall meeting, some other online or onsite gatherings. Even better! Check out what kind of possibilities there are in your organization that you can leverage. Be a mentor or a buddy for new joiners, or let others shadow you. There are more things you can do than you think. Choose what works for you, start with one thing, and then move to another one if you want.   How to Build Visibility Outside the Organization?   If you are outside of the organization: Maybe you are a consultant / a Fractional CTO / COO, etc.; if you are running your own business: you’re an entrepreneur, a Founder, you can do many things. And if you’re inside the organization, you can use some of those as well (these strategies are not reserved only for “the externals”). First, blogging. You can say that blogging is dead, but it couldn’t be further from the truth. People like to read, especially short forms. Because if you are a visual person, what you read sticks in your brain. So, blogging can be your visibility builder, especially when you take care of the SEO. It can be very well-positioned in Google and in AI tools where people are researching things. It is super easy and low-cost to start. Just start writing down what you know about. Share your expertise, research, pieces of lessons that you have, failures, and success stories. People love reading about those things. The second

Czytaj dalej
Leadership

Why Are We So Frustrated as Tech Leaders?

Just think about it for a moment. When was the last time you were angry, pissed off, or frustrated with the other person as a leader? Your direct report didn’t deliver something on time or to the quality that you wanted them to deliver? A person promised to do something, and they didn’t? Or a person asked you a question, you answered, and then they came back with the same question one time, two times, three times, five times? When was the time when you agreed on something? You made a contract on who is doing what:  With the client, a contractor, or a vendor; you delivered your part, and they didn’t? Or they did, but the quality of the work was not so good, and you got angry, you thought a lot of not-so-nice things, and maybe you even behaved in an aggressive way. If you’re nodding right now, you’re in the right place. In this article, I’m going to give you answers on why you get so upset when things like that happen, and what to do to manage it better. Let’s go into it. Why am I reacting like that? Do you know people who, even if something’s going on, are calm? It might seem that they don’t even care when you look at them. They’re all chilled out. And then, it’s you: Frustrated, angry, mad at others. Burning up, losing energy, and being exhausted at the end of the day. Is it your reality? If yes, it means that from a personality perspective, you have a strong Thinker or a Persister floor in your Personality Condo. Maybe a Promoter as well, if you are getting angry with people for being too slow (in your frame of reference, of course). It means that your beliefs about yourself in the world go like this: Thinker: “People need to be competent, deliver work on time, efficiently covering what’s there to be done”. Persister: “People need to be trustworthy, fulfilling the contracts that we have for delivering things, following processes we have in place”. Promoter: “People need to be strong, fast, and self-sufficient. They need to act, instead of talk or analyse all the time”. If we have convictions like that in our brains, and it is our default way of working, every person who’s not doing things like that will make us angry or resentful. It’s mostly unconscious, and until we start learning more about Communication Intelligence (CQ), it’s an automatic thinking pattern we go into in every situation that jeopardises how we think the world should look. Eustress vs Distress The answer to why we’re reacting in an aggressive or manipulative way when we have those thoughts in our brains is that we are in distress. Let’s unpack the stress part, since it’s not very often described in two ways: Eustress and Distress. Eustress is a positive stress. It: mobilizes us to take action; positively influences ourselves and people around us; keeps us in strengthening beliefs, pushes us to do things that bring extraordinary results. Eustress is a feeling of excitement, a little bit of adrenaline rushing through our veins, making us brave to go into the uncomfortable. Like being on the stage, sharing things we are truly passionate about with the thought in our brains that we can really change something while sharing it with the world. But, as always, there’s a dark side to the story. Distress is a negative stress. It: is an automatic sequence of thinking, reacting, and doing things (or not doing them at all); negatively influences ourselves and the people around us; keeps us in limiting beliefs, takes us away from the access to the resources we have in ourselves (intellectual, emotional, cognitive, etc.). We go into distress most of the time right away in two situations: We don’t have our physiological needs covered; We don’t have our motivational / psychological needs covered. So, if you’re hungry, thirsty, you haven’t been in the bathroom for hours, you lack sleep or physical touch of a close person, your body is upset, which makes it distressed. And if your motivational needs connected to your personality Base are not covered, your brain and soul are upset, which makes it distressed. Distress is visible when we are anxious, our heart is beating fast, our blood pressure is high, our voice, hands, and knees are shaking, sometimes we have a sore throat, and we can’t even say a thing. It’s when we forget everything we wanted to say, even if we’re well-prepared and equipped. It’s when we lose the brain-spine connection, and we start to behave extremely weirdly, like we’re not ourselves anymore. That’s where the anger, frustration, and consequently, burnout comes. What can we do about it? The awareness is one thing (super important), but action is crucial. Some things will be transferable for every personality Base, and some will be tailored. Let’s start with the individual ones, connected with the 3 types we’ve talked about above: For Thinkers: Make clear contracts, share tasks and responsibilities transparently, and put deadlines whenever you can. Ask for feedback for your efficient work delivered regularly. Structure your day / week, book slots for deep work in your calendar, and protect your time. For Persisters: Make clear contracts, double-check if people have everything they need (resources, skills, technology, etc.) to work efficiently. Ask for feedback for your principled work regularly. Share your convictions with others and have a conversation when you can gather positive recognition for what you believe in. For Promoters: Make a plan and follow it. Remember that not all people work as fast as you, so give them more time before the deadline is due. Take care of the diversification of what you do, so you don’t get bored too quickly. Plan some adrenaline rushes in your private and/or work life. The things you can do to protect yourself from going into distress that are universal to all personality bases are not fancy. I don’t think

Czytaj dalej
0
Would love your thoughts, please comment.x
()
x